Subject:

BADFIC: Insert Title Hear (MSR NC-17) by Rain E. Day

Date:

Fri, 02 Jun 2000 06:14:03 GMT

From:

rainfall@magma.carrot (Rain Elizabeth Day)

Organization:

Sympatico

Newsgroups:

alt.tv.x-files.creative

Summary: Mary Sue Whipple has inspired me to post my

X-Files fanfic debut ... an NC-17 badfic song story. I

figure I can only go up from here! :)

Content Warning: Hopefully, the worst-written sex scene you've

ever read, as well as repeated use of a particular profanity that

Scully did not utter in the movie. (Seriously, despite the badfic

treatment, this *is* NC-17 material and should not be read by

those under 18.)

Spoilers: One very small one for Memento Mori/CC/Emily (this

story was written long before Requiem aired.)

Disclaimer. None of the characters belong to me - in fact I

disown them right now! (They belong to 1013, although I doubt

anyone would want to claim them in their present incarnation...)

"Closer" belongs to Nine Inch Nails.

Archive: Badfic only, *please*! <g> (if that archive still

exists - does anyone know?)

*******

Insert Title Hear

by Rainnnnn

Petite red-haired enigmatic Dr. Dana Scully and dark brooding

chipper psychologist Fox Moulder were working in there office in

the FBI building where they were Special Agents. They worked in

a division called the X-Files which investigated clams of the

paranormal under Assistant Director Skinner.

Dana was thinking about the FBI ball and wondering if dark

brooding Mulder was finally - oh, finally! - going to ask her

this year when Suddenly a song came on the radio and Mudler

hummed along. His dark good looks enhancing the song.

"Help me Ive torn appart my insides!

Help me Ive got no sole to sell!

Help me the only thing that works for me

Help me get away from myself

I wanna fuck you like an animal

I wanna feel you on the inside

I wanna fuck you like an animal

My whole exisstence is flawd

You get me closer to God"

Except the radio blanked out the fuck part but Mulder put it in

anyways. Then he kept humming, glancing over at Scully.

Scully was strucken. Could he really mean it? He must - oh! -

he must mean it she thought in a panick because the song was all

about him. He was all screwed up and because of his childhood

and his sister disappearing and that stuff he thought his whole

existance was flawed. And she was always trying to get him to

go to Mass with her so she did get him closer to God. So he

must want to f*ck her like an animal!

When she finished panicking she was happy because she was soooo

much in love with Mulder although she thought they could never be

more than partners. But now he wanted to fu*k her like an

animal! (Scully was thinking the blanked out word becuase she

was too ladylike to utter such bad language)

She wanted to cry because she loved him so much, but it was so

unladylike to fuc* like an animal at the office, even if they

were in the basement. Mulder thought she had a wild side because

of her tatoo but she had her standards. And anyways, they'd

never even kissed on the lips!

She wrote him a note with two little boxes. Do you love me Fox?

Chek one, yes or no. Then she folded in that special way she

learned in junior hgh so the teacher couldnt open it. Or

skinner, she hoped. She knew it was silly but knowing that Fox

wanted to *uck her like an animal made her feel young and

carfree. So that's why she did something to remind her

of junior high school. Although she never f*cked like an animal

or any other way for that matter in junior high school. Except

she masterbaited alot which is normal and healthy and doesn't

actualy make you go blind. But she does wear reading glasses I

assure you its completely unrelated. Hey, she thought, a Fox

is an animal. No wonder he wants to f*ck me like an animal. She

giggled as she left down the hall to go to her autopsy.

Fox Mulder watched after his partner as she went to her autopsy.

She had only been gone for one minute but he already missed her

more than life itself. He had to tell her how he felt.

(Sometimes at night he felt himself in his bed but thats not what

he meant. He wares glases too sometimes and has hary hands but

its not from that) Then he saw that she left him a note. "Ohhhhh,

I hope hope hope hope hope" he crossed his fingers as he opened

the note. And yes! she was making the overture like he hoped.

He carefully checked the yes box and folded the note again. THen

he put it on her desk and went to visit the Lone Gunmen to rub

it into Frohickey.

When Sculy came back from her autopsy the note was on her desk!

And he checked the yes box! Dana kicked off her heels. yes! she

cried. its true! she wanted to danced on the desk but there was

to much paperwork. So instead she wrote another note. "you foxy

man I want you to come to my apartment later" (the foxy part was

a pun) Then she put the note in his bag of sunflower seeds and

went out of the office. Then she rode in the elevator and went

to her car and drove to the store. she went shopping for the

ingredients to a groumet dinner for fox.

Later that night mulder came to her apartment with wine and

flowers. He was going to bring condoms but then he remembered

that Sculy couldn't get pregnant because when she'd been abducted

they'd taken all her ovals except the vial Mulder took when

SCully was in the hospital with cancer. And those were probably

no good anymore because he accidently left them in the pocket of

his jeans when he washed them. But then he remembered that they

could catch an STD like gonnorhea or syphilis or chlamydia or

genital warts so he brought condoms too after all.

After they ate they started to kiss and then they took off their

clothes. Blood went to Mulder's penus and it swelled up. But it

was OK because they were going to have sex. Mulders penus

looked like a yummy banana all swelled up with a bacturial

infection thought Scully. And his testicles were very handsome

too. The hair on his chest was like burying her face in a

mountain of the stuff they sweep off the floor at the

hairdresser. And it smelled so good, like cream which was good

becuase it went with her strawberry scented tresses (she uses

that soap from the body shop that smels like strawberry kool aid

in case you want to buy some its usually about $2.40 plus

applicable sales tax)

Mulder thought Scully was so beautiful. Her hair was wild and

she had brests. Sometimes he forgot Scully was a girl but she

sure was! He felt her brests and her nipples stood up at

attention. Hail Mulder they said silently. They were ready for

roll call. (but scullys brests weren't actually soldiers) Mulder

sucked on them and Scully moaned and groaned alot.. Fox reached

into Scullys legs and stroked her private parts. Then she made

louder noises like a bus trying to stop suddenly when a little

old lady jaywalks in front of it. The noises were so sexy that

Mulder reared up in joy.

Mulder's large penus pointed masterly towards the centre of

Scully's hot centr of womanhood. It wanted to go home. (not to

Mudler's appartment but to it's home in scully's vagna) His

manhood was so big that her eyes widened. Their hips ground

around and a feeling washed through them. Then Scully began

havey breathing and so did Mulder. They sounded like a pervurt

on the phone except they weren't pervurts. And also they weren't

on the phone. Then Mulder felt Scully's womanly chestal mounds

with his hands and then he sucked them and moved his tongue

around.

"Oh FOOXXX" Scully scremed and then she rubbed her hands along

his slick rod. Then she put her mouth around it and licked it

and made him groan then she put on the condom. Using her

teeth!!! But he wanted all for her pleasure so he picked her up

and put her down on the bed and entred his tongue inside her

moist cave. She rithed and then he stoked her nub of nerves.

Then they turnd around so she could suck on his potruding penus

at the same time he was puting his tongue inside her. Thats

called a number i think its 72 or something i don't know why.

Then Sculy had an organism and she felt a feeling fill her

whole body. Then Mulder layed on top of her and then he kissed

her. She pulled his manhood towards her tunnel of moistness and

then it went in. It made a really sexy noise that drove mulder

mad. It sounded like a dolphin squeezing through a inner tube.

They thrust in and out and repeated that again sevral times and

then Mulder spasmed. He felt a feeling too. Then they layed

together and fell asleep.

"I love you fox" said Dana Scully-Mulder. Because after that

they new they were married in their hearts.

Mulder looked at her, his Dana. "You are the only one for me,

now and forever Dana" he declared. She had tears of happiness

running down her cheeks. She knew that now they would be

together forever. And they would name ther first dauter Samantha

Emily Melissa Margaret Charlie Bill Fox Teena Dana Katherine

Mulder-Scully. And there second one would be named Alex Holly

Pendrell Mary Sue 400 inch Rain. But they didn't know they would

have triplets. So the last one would be named Walder. After

they're boss, Skinner.

THE END

Oh yeah and its nc17. i'd go back up to the top to insert that

but i have to post this RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!! so i'm sure youl

understand.

**********

This badfic has been brought to you by the letter X and the number 69.

No foxes were actually harmed in the making of this fic. :)

------------

Rain Elizabeth Day

rainfall@magma.carrot (remove the r-r-o-t to reply)

Follow your dream - unless it's the one where you're at work in your

underwear during a fire drill.